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I read, this morning, between spoonfuls of weetabix (theirs, not mine) an article in last Sunday's Observer Magazine that really depressed me. You guessed it, it was yet another about how difficult it is being a parent (particularly a mother, sorry chaps) in today's Britain, and how the slummy mummies hate the yummy mummies and the working mothers hate the stay-at-home mothers, and in fact we all loathe each other and are actually all gritting our teeth through the playdates; or wanting to tear the eyes out of the mum down the road whose child has matching socks, or an Elmer birthday cake; or wishing we were at work; or wishing we weren't at work; or just generally willing our miserable, lonely, unfullfilled lives away, unsupported and unloved.
And I don't want to get into that debate again, and I don't want to argue endlessly about whether I should, or shouldn't be in the process of giving up my job (three more working days to go), or whether I am or am not a good mother because I enjoy time away from my children. But what I do want to do is to say that in the not-quite-six-months I've been blogging, I have never, not once, felt hated. In fact, I've never felt anything other than supported by the hundreds of mummies and daddies I have run into in cyber-space.
Never have I felt disliked, never have I been told I am wrong, never has anyone (other than me) said the words "bad parent". Instead, even when I've posted about stuff where I was wrong, or where I have worried about the choices I am making, I have felt the most immense amount of support, and, dare I say it, love, from the parents I have "met".
I'm not saying that we aren't competitive (see the MADS 2010 - and the ridiculous delight I feel at just learning that I have been nominated. Thank you so much to whoever that was), or that we don't sometimes disagree with each other's choices, but what I do think we're all bloody brilliant at is realising that other people's choices are just that, and although they might not be right for us, they're right for them.
Well done us and a huge thank you to everyone who has been so lovely over the last six months. Sometimes I think we don't realise how amazing we all are!
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ps apologies for gushyness. Normal cyncial service will resume shortly.
How to Make Star-Shaped Birdfeeders with Kids
18 hours ago
Feel free to gush, that article made me very mad indeed.
ReplyDeleteGreat post! I haven't read the offending article but I always find it infuriating when people try to suggest divisions that aren't even there. Where do these crazy ideas come from?!
ReplyDeleteGreat post Plan B! I too read that article and wondered why the media are so intent on creating divisions. I wonder if the author Lucy Cavendish approached them with the idea or whether they commissioned it first and dreamt it up at a features meeting and then she wrote it to fit. There was a similar one by Sali Hughes in The Guardian on Saturday.
ReplyDeleteI too have felt nothing but support from people I've met in the world of blogging. And at the school gates. Of course there's the odd spat but the way they portray it, it's as if we're at each others throats the whole time.
Well said!
Well, gushiness reciprocated. I don't know any of these people who are supposedly judging each other.
ReplyDeleteOnce more the press looking to sensationalize - I don't know any of these folk either as all my blogging friends are wonderful and very supportive.But that doesn't make such a good story I guess...
ReplyDeleteWhat a lovely positive post. I couldn't agree with you more and feel that I have been welcomed into the blogging community with open arms.
ReplyDeleteSometimes the good stuff just doesn't sell papers I guess...
HEAR HEAR ...
ReplyDeletemy nominations are in ;-)
xx
Congratulations on your nomination. Great post. x
ReplyDeleteThis is going to get rather cyclical isn't it? I'm going to thank you all for being so lovely about the fact that I've thanked you all for being so lovely....!
ReplyDeleteIt's nonetheless heartfelt for that though!
We're all just so terribly lovely. All of us. Hurrah for us. We're lovely!
ReplyDeletevery true, the internet folk are very supportive and welcoming people. congrats on being nominated!
ReplyDeleteGreat post and well said. I too love the variety of people I meet here in blogland (and in real life), and love hearing others perspectives and how they agonize over their own choices. Maybe the blog format gives us a chance to really hear people, and be more open to others idea. Or maybe bloggers are just all awesome people!
ReplyDeletebit late commenting but just wanted to say I completely agree. It would be nice to hear a different voice in the media, away from the negativity of the "slummy-mummy-we-can't-cope" genre.
ReplyDelete